Last week Pastor John preached on parts of Luke 9. You know the part of the Bible where Jesus says, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” Then we sang a song (below) in church today that talks about being the hands and feet of Jesus. There's a line that says, "I wanna give my life away, all for your kingdom's sake."
I want that. I can't tell you how much I want that. But I also feel a lot like the rich young ruler lately. I want to follow Jesus, but it's hard to leave behind the life I have here.
When I get on that plane to Haiti in three weeks, I'll be leaving behind
- watching Big Bang Theory with my dad
- hot showers any time I want
- Christmas with my family (I start crying every time I think about this. I have a plan for skyping with them that day, but it tears my heart out that I won't be there with them.)
- spur of the moment movie nights with friends
- going shopping with my mom whenever she comes to Mishawaka
- seeing my mom graduate from Bethel in May
- being able to communicate with nearly everyone I meet
- the many extended family get-togethers the Myers family has
- holding my best friends' babies as we talk about life
- giving and receiving hugs from the people I love
- understanding everything my students say to me
- watching funny TV shows with my friends
Don't get me wrong, I want to return to Haiti. I'm looking forward to it. I know that God wants me to be in Haiti, and I'm excited to get back there. It's just not as easy to say goodbye to life here as I wish it was.
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